• Danielle: How was breaking fast with the family?
  • Me: Good. They asked about you, y'know... They wanted to know if I ever hear from you.
  • Danielle: What did you tell them?
  • Me: I told them how you needed to talk to me yesterday at 2:30 AM because you watched some crap on the History Channel and were worried that the world was going to end in 2012.
  • Danielle: Great. What'd they think of that?
  • Me: Well, remember last year how you were obsessed with WebMD and thought you were always sick?
  • Danielle: ...yeah
  • Me: I told them you're just expanding your mind to see the bigger picture. Because while you used to call home every day afraid you were about to die, now you're afraid that the rest of the world is going to die right along with you.
  • Danielle: I call it progress
  • Me: Funny, I think they called it something else...